I'm a little apprehensive. It feels a little weird being back in school again. A few worries are on my mind. First, there's tuition. How am I going to pay for it?
I just got back from class. I paid for the parking. But I can't pay for tuition. How am I going to pay for tuition? I'm so frustrated. I want to get out of the rut, but the muck and mire keeps holding me back. I want to prevail, but I have just so much fortitude. Push comes to shove, I find out I can't afford the education and I'll get stuck in wherever it is I'm working now. The prospect for that is frightening. I guess I'll find out soon enough how this is going to pan out.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Start of Another New Day
I went shopping yesterday.*1 It was a pretty productive day. I cleaned my room and installed the new shelves and tried the new lamp. I'm glad I have so much more shelving space now and the room looks a lot prettier than before.
I'm started off the day doing chores -- laundry and some organizing. I'm sitting down to write this blog
I'm started off the day doing chores -- laundry and some organizing. I'm sitting down to write this blog
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Still No Calls
Still No Calls from Leah. I have, at this point, resigned myself to not receiving any calls from her.
The procrastination issue. I think I did well today (well, yesterday -- it's 1:15 AM right now). I did not watch any TV or idle my time away.
I finished some chores. Ate supper. It's 4 AM now. I think I should go to bed.
Well, I did end up going to bed at 4. I was comatose. Then Leah called and woke me up. I was glad that she called because today is Picnic*1 day. The conversation was disappointingly tepid.*2
On the issue of procrastination, I think I'm making some headway. I have managed to curb most of my impulses. Now, I just need a let's-get-right-down-to-business spirit, and I'm set.
The procrastination issue. I think I did well today (well, yesterday -- it's 1:15 AM right now). I did not watch any TV or idle my time away.
I finished some chores. Ate supper. It's 4 AM now. I think I should go to bed.
Well, I did end up going to bed at 4. I was comatose. Then Leah called and woke me up. I was glad that she called because today is Picnic*1 day. The conversation was disappointingly tepid.*2
On the issue of procrastination, I think I'm making some headway. I have managed to curb most of my impulses. Now, I just need a let's-get-right-down-to-business spirit, and I'm set.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Anxieties
I called Leah 2 days ago (17th). I'm a little dismayed that she hasn't called back. I wonder what's going on with her... she is usually pretty good with calling me back. Three possibilities that run through my mind are, in order of likelihood: 1. She's been too busy 2. She's avoiding me (I've offended her somehow) 3. Something happened to her. I'm a bit unsettled about the third possibility. She's got me a little worried and I'm really anxious to know why she hasn't called me back. I even emailed her last night.
Today's the 4th day of vacation. I've spent 3 days writing that damn review on the novel. Ugh! I finally managed to finish the review last night. What a relief! One major annoyance crossed off my list! I resolved to never again agree to writing a book review in exchange for a free copy of a book whenever an author or publisher solicits a review on their book (not any time soon at least) -- especially fiction (book reviews on fiction is a beast on its own that involves the plot/subplots, theme, character development, etc.). I really find book reviews on fiction an onerous undertaking. Writing reviews on non-fiction (memoirs, autobiographies, technical books), on the other hand, is a lot easier (mind you, not easy, but easier). However, I run into trouble whenever I need to criticize a book. I struggle hard to do so in a delicate and non-offensive way.
Okay, so much to do and so little time so the saying goes. That's exactly how I feel now. The most urgent task on my list is getting my car fixed. I had ignored the Check Engine light for some time now but now I can put off getting it checked out no longer. Just yesterday, while I was driving home after getting a cup of coffee from Starbucks*1, my car stalled -- not once, not twice, but several times. That really concerns me. Now, I'm worried about how much it will cost to fix it. I'm just hoping that it's nothing major. A preliminary diagnostics indicates that the problem is a "faulty oxygen intake sensor." *Sigh*, I'll have to bring it to the shop*2 today and get it looked at. I don't want to procrastinate doing this any longer.
So, this is the fourth day of my 2-week long vacation. I've "wasted" three day on a... well... probably legit cause. Besides, I feel pretty okay about goofing off the first three days of vacation. Hey, I took a break - that's okay - I don't beat myself up over it. It's okay. It's a break. Starting from today, however, I plan on making productive use of the rest of my vacation days. What worries me is I'll slack off into procrastination the rest of my vacation.
I plan on taking action against procrastination today. When I started writing this piece, I asked myself if I was doing it to procrastinate again. My answer - no. Writing down my thoughts helps me to collect -- and possibly calm -- myself. Now, on to the problem of procrastination. The book*3 I've read has proven to be immensely helpful. I have taken notes on it -- it's in one of my blog entries. Then I happened on another book at Amazon The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play [Paperback]. The book averages 4.5 stars out of 5 on 138 customer ratings as of this writing.
Another device I plan on using to help me combat my procrastination is a TME -- a Time Management Evaluation tool to help me record how I spend my time. I started doing it some time back, but I haven't been very consistent. (It's nothing more than an Excel file with columns corresponding to the day and rows that corresponding to the time [30 minute increments]). I resolve to be consistent in recording how I spend my time. My sense is being cognizant of how I spend each minute of the day will help me greatly towards using my time more wisely. Plus, it keeps me accountable for how I spend my time.
Today's the 4th day of vacation. I've spent 3 days writing that damn review on the novel. Ugh! I finally managed to finish the review last night. What a relief! One major annoyance crossed off my list! I resolved to never again agree to writing a book review in exchange for a free copy of a book whenever an author or publisher solicits a review on their book (not any time soon at least) -- especially fiction (book reviews on fiction is a beast on its own that involves the plot/subplots, theme, character development, etc.). I really find book reviews on fiction an onerous undertaking. Writing reviews on non-fiction (memoirs, autobiographies, technical books), on the other hand, is a lot easier (mind you, not easy, but easier). However, I run into trouble whenever I need to criticize a book. I struggle hard to do so in a delicate and non-offensive way.
Okay, so much to do and so little time so the saying goes. That's exactly how I feel now. The most urgent task on my list is getting my car fixed. I had ignored the Check Engine light for some time now but now I can put off getting it checked out no longer. Just yesterday, while I was driving home after getting a cup of coffee from Starbucks*1, my car stalled -- not once, not twice, but several times. That really concerns me. Now, I'm worried about how much it will cost to fix it. I'm just hoping that it's nothing major. A preliminary diagnostics indicates that the problem is a "faulty oxygen intake sensor." *Sigh*, I'll have to bring it to the shop*2 today and get it looked at. I don't want to procrastinate doing this any longer.
So, this is the fourth day of my 2-week long vacation. I've "wasted" three day on a... well... probably legit cause. Besides, I feel pretty okay about goofing off the first three days of vacation. Hey, I took a break - that's okay - I don't beat myself up over it. It's okay. It's a break. Starting from today, however, I plan on making productive use of the rest of my vacation days. What worries me is I'll slack off into procrastination the rest of my vacation.
I plan on taking action against procrastination today. When I started writing this piece, I asked myself if I was doing it to procrastinate again. My answer - no. Writing down my thoughts helps me to collect -- and possibly calm -- myself. Now, on to the problem of procrastination. The book*3 I've read has proven to be immensely helpful. I have taken notes on it -- it's in one of my blog entries. Then I happened on another book at Amazon The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play [Paperback]. The book averages 4.5 stars out of 5 on 138 customer ratings as of this writing.
Another device I plan on using to help me combat my procrastination is a TME -- a Time Management Evaluation tool to help me record how I spend my time. I started doing it some time back, but I haven't been very consistent. (It's nothing more than an Excel file with columns corresponding to the day and rows that corresponding to the time [30 minute increments]). I resolve to be consistent in recording how I spend my time. My sense is being cognizant of how I spend each minute of the day will help me greatly towards using my time more wisely. Plus, it keeps me accountable for how I spend my time.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
A List of Words That Look and Sound Interesting
I'm starting a collection of words that I like based on its meaning or the way it sounds (I think the word "unbeknownst", for example, sounds very interesting; even the spelling looks unusual).
asunder
unbeknownst
This list should build up over time.
asunder
unbeknownst
This list should build up over time.
Vacation: Day 01
Today is the first day of a 2-week vacation. I woke up at 10:00 AM today (a few moments ago). I want to make the most of the vacation. I'll start with writing down a list of things I want to accomplish by the end of the first and second weeks of vacation.
I spent last night watching a movie with Leah. Thought it'd be a good way to start my vacation - not being alone.
I spent last night watching a movie with Leah. Thought it'd be a good way to start my vacation - not being alone.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Leah Called!
Ah... yes. Yet another blog entry. I'm starting to think I can follow through with my resolve to make regular blogging a habit. It looks promising at the point. I'm so proud of myself!
Leah called! Last night. At about 9:30 PM, my land line rang, but as usual, I didn't pick up. A few moments later, my cell phone rang. Right then, I knew it was her. I could feel my heart flutter with sheer jubilation and happiness. I looked at my phone. Sure enough, it was her. The relief after being in anguish for days had finally come. I sat there for a few moments basking in the afterglow that was still emanating from my being. I had just gotten back home from work at the time and had barely sat down for dinner. And then this turn of events came -- very unexpectedly.
I called her back at close to 11:30 PM. We talked for about an hour. She said she was glad that I called [her back].
Leah called! Last night. At about 9:30 PM, my land line rang, but as usual, I didn't pick up. A few moments later, my cell phone rang. Right then, I knew it was her. I could feel my heart flutter with sheer jubilation and happiness. I looked at my phone. Sure enough, it was her. The relief after being in anguish for days had finally come. I sat there for a few moments basking in the afterglow that was still emanating from my being. I had just gotten back home from work at the time and had barely sat down for dinner. And then this turn of events came -- very unexpectedly.
I called her back at close to 11:30 PM. We talked for about an hour. She said she was glad that I called [her back].
Friday, January 14, 2011
Exercise
I exercised! I did interval training on my treadmill. 6 sets of runs for 20 seconds each @9 mph with 30 rest intervals in between.
I'm planning on running the 100th San Francisco Bay To Breakers on May 15, 2011. I haven't registered for it yet. Hopefully the special cap on registration (imposed due to the 100th Anniversary of the Bay To Breakers) hasn't filled up by the time I get around to registering for it :P. Hopefully I would have overcome my procrastination before then.
I'm planning on running the 100th San Francisco Bay To Breakers on May 15, 2011. I haven't registered for it yet. Hopefully the special cap on registration (imposed due to the 100th Anniversary of the Bay To Breakers) hasn't filled up by the time I get around to registering for it :P. Hopefully I would have overcome my procrastination before then.
Procrastination, Mainly About
Procrastination, Mainly About (Edited)
I'm going cuckoo over not getting any calls from Leah. The mental anguish is getting exceedingly unbearable. Ugh!
I finished a book a few days ago called The Procrastination Equation: How to Stop Putting Things Off and Start Getting Stuff Done. I just whipped up some notes on it as I started to realize that I was starting to fall back into seriously procrastinating on my to-do list. Making the notes and reminding myself the strategies I can use to overcome procrastination helps me to settle back into the frame of mind to start doing the things I need to do without further delay. It's still a work in progress: (moved to February 14th entry)
I'm going cuckoo over not getting any calls from Leah. The mental anguish is getting exceedingly unbearable. Ugh!
I finished a book a few days ago called The Procrastination Equation: How to Stop Putting Things Off and Start Getting Stuff Done. I just whipped up some notes on it as I started to realize that I was starting to fall back into seriously procrastinating on my to-do list. Making the notes and reminding myself the strategies I can use to overcome procrastination helps me to settle back into the frame of mind to start doing the things I need to do without further delay. It's still a work in progress: (moved to February 14th entry)
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
My Past Self
I'm trying to make it a habit of recording the happenings in my life so they will not be forgotten. It's important to me because there is no one whom I can share them with, so I alone bear the responsibility of remembering my past. My past is a part of my identity, and it's important to me that it should not be forgotten. Without a remembrance of my past, I lose a vital part of me -- my past self, the precursor to my present self, my past hopes and dreams and thoughts -- that's a part of me as much as any attribute that makes me uniquely me. It is my self, both past and present, that makes me whole.
If I had close friends and family to share my life with, that's a different story. My life would then consist of experiences with them and they would be living testament to my life's experiences. Do any of this even make sense, or do I sound like I'm ranting. Oh, well, either way it doesn't matter. What matter is I put my thoughts in writing.
Leah hasn't called my in two days. I have a strange and inexplicable hankering for contact with her. I could, of course, call her, but it feels like my calls would be unsolicited. I feel so utterly alone and lonely. There is nary a human being I can spill my guts out to. Such is the reality I live in. My reality.
If I had close friends and family to share my life with, that's a different story. My life would then consist of experiences with them and they would be living testament to my life's experiences. Do any of this even make sense, or do I sound like I'm ranting. Oh, well, either way it doesn't matter. What matter is I put my thoughts in writing.
Leah hasn't called my in two days. I have a strange and inexplicable hankering for contact with her. I could, of course, call her, but it feels like my calls would be unsolicited. I feel so utterly alone and lonely. There is nary a human being I can spill my guts out to. Such is the reality I live in. My reality.
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